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zen
14 February 2013 @ 10:25 pm
Hey guys. I'm mostly on tumblr these days. Maybe you are too? Feel free to add me if you feel so inclined.
 
 
zen
05 November 2010 @ 12:21 am
"Haiku"
Izumi Shikibu

Even if I now saw you
Only once,
I would long for you
Through worlds,
Worlds.


[exceptindreams]
 
 
 
zen
Visited Detroit last weekend for the first time since late May. First time I'd seen my parents since Easter. Had a great time seeing my lovely jaidesu, talking and eating noodles and chocolate and watching a million episodes of Community.

I miss that city so much sometimes. It the best and worst place in the world. I wish everything wasn't so terrible with the economy and everything falling apart there and no money no money no money, I almost want to move back there some day. There's so much more there. I love the freeway, I love the middle eastern fruit markets in the ghetto, I love the diversity and water everywhere and everything being so wide. She is mine, I feel like I've betrayed her. I miss my cats. My parents have been fostering kittens and I want to take one home every time I visit, I miss my cats so much. They are getting old and I'm not there to help take care of them, it kills me.

But I love this city too, and there are things here that I love. IDGAF, I love the Midwest. It is ridiculous and terrible and nothing but flat corn fields, hot in the summer and cold in the winter, but I love it that way. I love Detroit, I love Chicago, I love Columbus, I love Fort Wayne. Everything is terrible and wonderful.

Life is all working and cleaning and baking and drinking coffee and shounen manga. I like it but I don't think I'm supposed to.

I want to take a sewing class and a drawing class. I want to be a baker and a plumber and a social worker and a housewife. I want to have a child, I want to run away to China and never see anyone for years and cry when I think about the soy bean fields in Indiana and snow in the winter and the Charlie Brown Christmas soundtrack and miss everything.

I think I am ahead and I am behind. I think about androids and modifying my body and being connected all the time and why isn't that now, and thank god it's not now. I still listen to Be Human and Yours Truly, 2095 and The Future Soon and Rainbow Girl and sink into these thoughts. I watch Hatsune Miku's concert and think of Sharon Apple and how we are all doomed and isn't it wonderful? I would rather die in the robot wars than keel over from tuberculosis, any day, I will die by my own hand, the one that simply wanted the future and got too much. But probably it will be radiation or too much modified food or I will simply just keep regenerating my cells until I just can't bear it anymore. This is what I think about when it is dark, which is most of the time in Indiana in October and it will only grow darker and I am fine with that. I was born in the winter, that's where I am. To live and die in the forest.

I am actually very happy and isn't it odd?
 
 
zen
29 July 2010 @ 02:29 am
1; Note to self, stop substituting fiber bars for full meals. Fiber bars and extra strength ibuprofen. Not. A meal.

2; Started watching Breaking Bad and at the same time I also started The Story of Saiunkoku. Which is...an amusing combination if there ever was one. Holy balls, has it been a while since I watched a shoujo series. My inner 13-year-old approves. Bishies, bishies everywhere.

I also watched Strong World this past week. It probably shouldn't have made me as happy as it did. No, actually, I am perfectly okay with being this happy about it. One Piece is a punch to the gut full of happiness and thank you sir, may I have another?

3; Work is giving me more hours, yay? I guess it's a good thing because they have most likely fired someone else instead of me. Still can't get out of the "everything will soon implode" mindset, annoyingly enough. Maybe I will calm down one of these weeks. Months. Etc.

4; So yeah, going to North Carolina for a week next month and fuckin' A, if I don't get the time off I will be so damn mad. But my manager's a pretty cool bro, sooo hopefully that'll be alright! Calm down, self.

5; 2am once more, waiting for Shounen Jump scans to hit the net. Story of my life. I am okay with this.
 
 
 
zen
23 July 2010 @ 02:15 am
Comment on this entry and I will give you a letter. Name 5 songs you love starting with that letter.

listensostill gave me B.

Robyn; Be Mine! [video]

Charlotte Hatherley; Behave [video]

Pogo; Bangarang [video]

Telepopmusik; Breathe [video]

Ghost in the Shell OST; Be Human [video]
 
 
 
zen
20 June 2010 @ 02:28 am
"Catch a Body"
Ilse Bendorf

Salinger, I’m sorry, but “Don’t ever tell
anybody anything” is a string of words
I would like to wrap up in canvas and sink
to the bottom of the Hudson, or extract
by laser from the ribcage of all of us
who ever believed it, who felt afraid
to miss someone, to be the last one
standing. “Tell everyone everything” is
not exactly right, but I do believe that if
your mother looks radiant in violet
you should tell her, or when a juvenile
sparrow thrashes its wings in dustpiles
and reminds you of a lover’s eyelashes,
you should say so. We are islands all of us,
but we are also boats, our secrets flares,
pyrotechnic devices by which we signal
there’s someone in here we’re still alive!
So maybe it’s, “don’t be afraid.” We can
rewrite Icarus, flame-resistant feathers,
wax that won’t melt, I mean it, I’ll draw up
a prototype right now, that burning ball
of orange won’t stop us, it’ll be everything
we dream the morning after, even if we fall
into the sea—we are boats, remember?
We are pirates. We move in nautical miles.
Each other’s anchors, each other’s buoys,
the rocket’s red, already the world entire.


[exceptindreams]
 
 
 
zen
11 June 2010 @ 03:48 am
1; I got a job slinging pizza. My training starts in about 12 hours. Although I'm not sure how much it will actually involve pizza; I think I am mostly destined to be a cashier girl, as pretty girls are wont to be (or so say the higher-ups). But from what I've been told, they do like to rotate us, so food prep and shaker boarding (you know...where you stand on the corner of an intersection and advertise for great justice?) is most likely in my future.

2; Holy balls, Durarara is good. One Piece makes me cry, it's so wonderful. And Doctor Who was one of those shows I never thought I'd watch when Tennant was around, but the 11th Doctor and Amy Pond are asdfghjkl; I LIKE IT. Supernatural is being turned into an anime. By motherfucking MADHOUSE! What!

3; Everything went better than expected.


Esperanza Spalding - I Adore You

 
 
zen
20 May 2010 @ 02:42 am
I want a job so that I can make money and I want money to pay for ridiculous costumery and trips to places that are not here. A dinky North Carolina convention can get Kappei Yamaguchi and a behemoth of a Chicago convention can't. The band sucked this year. I still had a good time, even if I was so tired after walking around in heels all day that I just wanted to lay in the hotel room the entire night and play Pokemon and stare at the ceiling while our Japanese club member played erogames on his laptop and the girl from Ball State ate Nutella straight from the jar while flipping through untranslated doujins.

I want to start a garden but the backyard doesn't get any goddamn sunlight. Fucking grocery store cucumbers, this is why I eat so many hotdogs, delicious as they may be. I switched to non-HFCS buns, they cost twice as much asdfghjl.

I guess I am a Comp Sci major now, even though that doesn't mean much seeing as I can't afford to take more than two classes a semester and my boyfriend's upper-middle class parents have the audacity to think I'm lazy or something.

One Piece need's a bigger fandom, it is half of the thing that keeps me happy anymore.

I should probably stop making LJ posts at 3am, my life is really not this depressing.
 
 
 
zen
16 April 2010 @ 05:05 pm
oh god oh god oh god

I submitted an application at JoAnn Fabrics yesterday and they just called me, wanting an interview tomorrow morning! FFFFFFfffffffff Not sure if I'm more happy or nervous~

I should...probably get a driver's license. >_>; Although since Joe doesn't have a job right now either, he can probably drive me until I get one; worst case scenario I can just take the bus, since there's a stop right by us and I'm sure they stop up at the mall there all the time.

Either way, omg, possible job at a somewhat respectable location?! No flipping burgers?!? *_*b

Maaan, this is so awesome. I really hope I get this. I've been going to the gym and really feeling good lately and this would raise my self esteem like crazy. Plus, I'd love to be able to get discount materials for cosplay, mmmfufufu~

ANYWAY

 
 
zen
24 March 2010 @ 02:18 am
1; So, Cat! You went AWOL from LJ for four months! What do you have to show for it? Some ridiculous One Piece cosplay, of course~

Mmmfufufu~Collapse )

Ohayocon
January 2010 // Columbus OH

My boyfriend Joe and I dressed as Emporio Ivankov (and our friend Josh as prisoner Buggy!). Oh my god, the amount of people we probably scarred for life... (including most of the cheerleading convention sharing the hotel with us). But good times were had. Lots of great OP cosplayers (including Sadi-chan and a giant Kaku, oh man~). Anime Central in May should be even better. Especially seeing as it was 30 degrees outside during this con and we had to walk through the parking structure in costume a few times. Spring, motherfucker! >:3

2; nostalgia nostalgia nostalgia



3; CURRENT GOALS:
1. Flip burgers for great justice.
2. ???
3. Profit.